Guest Blog

My friend Myron Boyajian wanted to post this as a comment but space doesn't permit it, so I am giving him full rein. All italics are mine. Here's what he had to say:

Your December 9, 2009 post hit home with me. I have seen the erosion of civility and I am disturbed by it. True civility and respect for another person have been replaced by slovenly manners, dress, speech, and thinking. We see this on TV sitcoms with a 10 year old kid with a 30 year old mouth spouting double entendres and remarks that ridicule adults, or in our public life, a swinging door closed in one's face because the person ahead was too inconsiderate to give a backward glance, and, well, the list just goes on. We see how lost courtesy extends to our social interaction with fellow humans. For example, we see honest, forthright verbal exchanges replaced by cutesy one-liners and snide comments. If one speaker believes there may be a chance for financial or social gain from the other speaker, than we see a verbal barrage of insincere oily commentary and flattery flow like a Niagara.

This behavior has not only increased naturally, but is actively being taught! For example a recent article in the IEEE (Institute of Electrical and Electronics Engineers) Spectrum magazine reported that the University of Potsdam actually teaches a kind of "Flattery 101." The course was planned for engineering undergraduates. My thoughts noted below are my response to the Spectrum article, but are applicable to any profession or social position. They are:

Forget flirting--a more valuable learning experience for EEs (or any other engineer, for that matter) should include:

Learn to use basic engineering knowledge in technical problem-solving.

Learn and use written and spoken language skills that include proper spelling, grammar, and punctuation.

Develop a good work ethic. Don't depend on someone else in the "team" to do your work.

Learn good personal habits, including basics like bathing, grooming, brushing your teeth, and wearing clean (not necessarily new or expensive) clothes.

If you are going to be a professional, then act, speak, dress, and work like one. If you carry yourself well, good social and professional intercourse will follow. The aura you project will do all the flirting for you.

If you want to slouch your way through life acting, looking, and thinking like the classic grungy, impecunious undergraduate, then do so, but don’t expect flirting skills to cover for you.

Thanks for letting me rant,

Myron

As always, I welcome your comments below. I expect Myron will be interested too.