Our son Daniel, our only biological child, died in 1993, and our mothers are both gone too. It's not exactly a happy day for us.
Except
Our good friend Tim, whose parents died while he was in high school, gave us his two boys a dozen years ago to be grandparents to. We love David and Jonathan dearly, and have enjoyed watching them grow up. David is finishing his junior year at Beloit College and Jonathan has three more weeks of high school. He was named Outstanding Broadcasting Student at last night's awards banquet at his high school. He plans at this point to attend the University of Wisconsin- Milwaukee in the fall.
Except
Two of my former students Derek and Shannon, brother and sister, chose me their dad shortly after we got grandkids. Shannon has a wonderful boyfriend who has three great kids of his own. Our beautiful granddaughter Ella who will be a year old in August, is Derek and Jo's. They live in Colorado where Derek is a veterinarian.
I frequently hear that you can't choose your family. I have to disagree. We have a wonderful chosen family, people who enfold us with love.
I also have a chosen sister, Laurie, who is on the faculty at Stanford, where she received her Ph.D. a couple of years ago. Chosen cousins Rochelle and Margaret live in the Chicago area and we see them frequently, but not as often as we'd like.
Sunday is Mother's Day, but we'll be avoiding crowds where people say, "Happy Mother's Day" without realizing the implications it has for us. Instead, we'll be going to Shannon's for brunch.
It will be a bittersweet Mother's Day as usual. But we will spend it with people we love.
As always, feel free to comment below.
3 comments:
How beautiful that you were able to embrace so many other people after your devastating loss. I hope I have the capacity to do the same if I'm asked.
I hope you never have to face that!
Another Except: You and Ann have been a mother and father to many. Every student you ever had that became enthused about life and learning because of you. Every patient and client Ann eased or healed as a therapist. All those people, animals and things you have loved and nurtured, every creative project. All these are your children. So, keeping that in mind. Happy Mother's and Father's Day to you, nurtures both.
Love,
Julie M
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